• Shanna

Taking Action on Self-Care

By now, you’ve probably seen a million articles on self-care by all sorts of writers— people with or without credentials, people trying to sell you stuff, celebrities, or lifestyle bloggers. A lot of them say relatively the same thing — Do a face mask, go on a walk, or read a book. Sound familiar?

I’m here to tell you that self-care is not just face masks or going on walks or reading a book (although it can be those things too!). It can be so much more than that. Self care is really about putting yourself first, especially when it is hard to do, when you feel you don’t have the time, or when you don’t have the energy. It is about making a hard decision to put yourself first when it would be easier to just go about your day and be stressed and overwhelmed. So you may be asking yourself by this point, what situations fit this category of self-care?

- Leaving a toxic relationship

- Leaving a toxic job situation

- Setting firm boundaries with those you care about

- Taking things off of your already overcrowded plate

- Moving to a new city away from your family and friends

- Realizing that what you’ve been doing is not working and you may need some extra help from a therapist

People often keep themselves in these types of situations because of fear of change or fear of unknown. They might ask themselves, “What if things become worse and I end up being MORE miserable?” Or “What if I feel lonely or isolated or lost?” These are the kinds of questions and thoughts that keep us stuck in toxic situations and negative emotions.

They keep the wheel of negativity spinning rather than breaking the wheel all together.

The thing you have to ask yourself is: what if that leap of faith into the unknown actually made your life the best it’s EVER been? What if you end up feeling happy and fulfilled? These questions will never be answered if you stay stuck in that wheel of negativity and don’t put yourself first. Don’t let it get you.

Change will never come to be unless you put the change in motion.

What are you doing for your self-care today?


© Proudly created with

Shanna Licouris, LMFT